We often get caught up in chasing milestones—owning a home, landing the perfect job, or achieving financial security—believing that happiness lies in reaching those goals. But true fulfillment isn’t found in the finish line; it’s in the path we take to get there. This realization became clear to me when I made a difficult decision that, at first, filled me with doubt but ultimately brought clarity and peace.
This blog is inspired by a chapter from “Clarity Cookies: 52 Bite-Size Discoveries for the Ravenous Soul” by Nayerie Youssefian, a book filled with lessons on life, growth, and self-discovery. One of those lessons came to me when I had to make a choice that tested my intuition and values.
The Home That Wasn’t Meant to Be
In the summer of 2010, my parents offered to buy me a house. By anyone’s standards, this was an extravagant gift, and I was beyond grateful. We embarked on the process—researching, visiting properties, and making plans—but something didn’t feel right. My intuition nagged at me, and after a few discussions, I made the difficult choice to let go of the house. Not just for myself, but for my younger sister, who needed it more than I did.
“So, on a cool, crisp night, with my mind feeling free, I sat my parents down and told them I was having a lot of physical pain on these outings to look at homes, which was true, and that I thought they should get one for my younger sister instead.”
My sister had a family of six. A house meant stability for them. A few months later, my brother-in-law lost his job, and they were forced to sell their home quickly. The decision I made, difficult as it was, turned out to be exactly what they needed. Still, I couldn’t shake the doubt. Had I given up something I shouldn’t have? Did I make a mistake trusting my gut?
The Struggle of Letting Go
“In the months following that decision, I was filled with doubt. I wanted a home of my own to decorate and live comfortably in, without the expense. Some of the homes I had seen were so cute, and I imagined living in one of them. I wanted to ask for the opportunity back.”
I wrestled with regret, longing for something I had willingly surrendered. But at the same time, I knew deep down that the decision was right. I had given my sister and her family the chance for a stable home, and that mattered more than my personal desires. It took time, but eventually, I was able to let go of the longing for what could have been.
Embracing the Journey
Reading about family dynamics in a book helped me gain perspective. It emphasized independence and the value of making your own way. That’s when I truly understood: happiness isn’t about the end goal—it’s about who we become along the way.
“Owning a house is nice, but it’s like reaching a goal or arriving at your destination. It’s the icing on the cake. I finally figured it out. I want the actual journey to a house, which, to me, is a delicious cake. It’s not the goal that matters. It’s who we become as a person on the way to the goal.”
This realization was a clarity cookie—an unexpected but valuable lesson that reshaped how I viewed happiness and success. Life isn’t about shortcuts or reaching a certain status. It’s about growth, resilience, and the experiences that shape us. When I shifted my mindset from regret to gratitude, I felt lighter. I realized that the journey itself was the real reward.
Reflection: What’s Your Journey?
If you find yourself fixated on a goal, ask yourself:
- What can I enjoy in the present moment?
- What are my major life goals, and how can I make them possible?
- What excites me about my current path?
The answers might surprise you. In the end, the things we chase aren’t what fulfill us—it’s the path we take and the growth we experience along the way. So, if given the choice between the journey and the destination, choose the journey. You won’t regret it.
Recently, I came across a passage by Souza that perfectly captures this idea. It reminded me that happiness isn’t something we achieve once we’ve cleared every obstacle—it’s something we create along the way. I want to leave it here as a final thought:
“For a long time, it seemed to me that life was about to begin—real life.
Souza
But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first,
some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid.
At last, it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.
This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness.
Happiness is the way.
So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one.”
That’s the lesson I keep coming back to. Life doesn’t begin after we reach a goal—it’s happening now, in every step we take. Every challenge, every small win, every moment of doubt, and every burst of joy—this is the journey that shapes us.
What about you? Have you ever had an experience where you realized the journey mattered more than the destination? I’d love to hear your thoughts! Leave your experiences in the comments below. Let’s grow together. 💙✨
52 Bite-Size Discoveries for the Ravenous Soul
Clarity Cookies 
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